I can't believe how time has passed so quickly, my having begun this prep mid August. It's now only days away from my first competition.
Reflecting on my progress, I truly have to marvel at the changes that have taken place: Increased strength, definition, lean body mass, endurance. I've dropped weight and clothes size. I no longer have anything to wear to work! One pair of pants that slightly fit! I have recomped my body in ways I never thought possible in a seemingly very short period of time.
When I began, did I think I was up to this challenge? Hopefully. Was I confident that I could get my body as lean as I needed to in order to comfortably and confidently compete in my division? No. Hopeful, yes. Certain? No.
It has been a fabulously rewarding journey, and I have no regrets. As the days wind down to the finish line, I feel more tired, sluggish, very depleted, no longer able to complete my morning cardio runs; I have had to replace the runs with power walking. I've had to will myself to DIG DEEP these last two days as I struggle to find the energy to complete my cardio and training. The past couple of days I've felt somewhat dizzy and slightly -- "buzzed," if that makes sense. I'm told it's because I'm depleted and dehydrated, and that it's a normal way to feel at this stage. My training is nowhere near as intense as it has been, as training now takes back seat to cardio. Posing is priority. One can never get too much practice posing.
All plans have been made, nails and tanning appointments scheduled, jewelry and makeup selected and packed, my list of things to take with me being added to daily. I've begun having food dreams. Oh, mercy! Is that freaky or what? I dream of loaded gooey pizza; fresh, warm, homemade sourdough bread, smothered in garlic and cheese, dipped in olive oil and spices. Mississippi Mud Cake. Pita Chips. Ergo wine. These are the things I crave. I fear I will go crazy when I finally get to eat normally that first meal following the competition.
I don't want to totally lose control. I want to maintain focus to preserve the progress I've made. Realizing that keeping my body fat at this percentage during off season is not practical, nor is it desireable, I still want to maintain my tighter, leaner body within a realistic degree.
Who would have ever thought that at 51 I would be competing in my first figure competition? That I would ever be this lean, this strong, this fit --
in my fifties. Where do I go from here? What are my goals from this point forward? How can I use this experience to help others achieve their own goals?
My thoughts collide with questions and ponderings.
All I care about right now is walking out on that stage with unwavering confidence and pride, embracing my intentional alter ego as I
showcase the passion that I have been living for the past few months. I want to say to the world:
I AM MY COMPETITION.
I AM AN ATHLETE.
I HAVE GIVEN 100% EFFORT TO THIS SPORT.
And now it's
MY TIME TO SHINE.
