Learning to Focus

So only a few days away from the big day.  Time has flown by, as it always does -- it won't wait around.  It's why setting a goal and putting a date with it is so crucial.

Having applied countless lessons of my past to setting my goal for losing 15 pounds by the wedding day -- my middle son to his college sweetheart -- I realize that my focus wasn't always what it needed to be.  But I've made progress, and it's best that I now focus on that, the positive -- decent progress -- rather than focusing on my having fallen short of my goal.

I began the Monday after the Fourth of July weekend, hoping to lose 15 pounds by wedding day. I've lost 9.5.  So am I going to stew over the 4.5 pounds I DIDN'T lose? Frankly, I am a little pissed at myself for having lost focus several times over the past several weeks and giving in to emotional eating.  Had I stayed with it, focused more, eye on the target, PUSHED, I would have made it.  But it is what it is, and I'm just glad that I've come this far.  The fact that I have more pounds to lose (for my own personal goal, regardless of an event) is not going to keep me from enjoying every minute of this grand celebration of a young couple's new life together.  Let's have us a wedding!  My son is getting married!  I still can't believe it's really happening.

So I tried on my dress yesterday -- I returned the charcoal gray one, having found a taupe one I liked better, lacy with little blingy sequins all throughout -- and decided that it's a good thing I DIDN'T totally blow my goal.  This dress is certainly not forgiving.  It clings and fits like a glove.  It shows every little curve.  YIKES.  But I'm happy with my selection, satisfied that I've given at least 75% effort.  It's all good. And so here's a toast ......to everlasting love......and I'm gonna sing and dance and laugh and cry and celebrate that my son is going to marry the love of his life.

Wasn't it just yesterday that my little guy was waddling along the shore, 

picking up sea shells and sand 

and thrusting them into the ocean, 

clapping and laughing joyfully 

with that deep belly laugh he had

 ... I hear him 

... I see him

... How can this be?

The next order of business:  Trying very hard not to cry during the Mother of the Groom dance.  It's a sappy one.  I would have preferred upbeat, but for whatever reason he doesn't seem to have much rhythm (we practiced a few months ago -- tragic!), so we're going with a slow one.  Heather Headley's "Wish for You."

Focus, T.  I'm not going to cry, I'm not going to cry, I'm not going to cry ...