I can always tell when it's coming. Having reported for him this many years, I can almost feel it in my bones. He's not one fond of wasting time, and he's not afraid to tell 'em about it. In the meantime, I've mastered the art of suppressing giggles.
THE COURT: Mr. Lewis, do you want to sit here and argue all morning?
MR. LEWIS: No, Judge, I do not.
THE COURT: Well, then I've ruled. You have an objection on the record.
Let's get on with it. We're just --
MR. LEWIS: Yes, Your Honor.
THE COURT: -- You're chopping, but no chips are flying, buddy. You got any other motions?
MR. LEWIS: I do, Judge.
THE COURT: Let's go. Move.
THE COURT: Overruled. Let's get moving. May I ask -- Come here.
(Counsel approached the bench.)
AT THE BENCH AND OUT OF THE HEARING OF THE JURY:
THE COURT: What is the significance of this building permit? You have beat that thing -- that horse is deader than hell, about fix feet under. Can we move on to the issues here? I've been worrying about that damn building permit, and y'all done beat the hell out of that thing.
MR. SMITH: Yes, Your Honor. I'll move on, sir.
2 comments:
The "you're chopping, but no chips are flying" remark truly made me spit on my keyboard. Hilarious!
You and me both. He kills me with his colloquialisms.
And now and then he'll look over at me, his eyebrows on top of his head, his nose all scrunched up, and I accurately interpret that as:
WHAT THE HELL???
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