Marco Island Sunset

Marco Island Sunset
Sunset at Marco ....my slice of paradise

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Weekend Highlights

I began taking my fall decorations down off the shelf in the garage on Friday evening.  I lit candles, poured myself a glass of wine, and turned on some Oscar Peterson...allowing myself to get lost in the ecstacy and expectation of the season ahead.

A dear close GF from the gym stopped by around 8.  She's going through some tough issues and needed to unload, needed an ear, a shoulder, a heart willing to listen.  I listened.  I let her purge.  I shared back.  And then without a hitch, I subtley adjusted the tenor, rerouting her to happy things and laughter and girl stuff.  We so get each other.  She is a mirror of my soul.

The next morning my husband and I skyped with Zach from Japan...that is, after I managed to arouse Rip Van Winkle ... he's NEVER slept in so late!  What's up with THAT.  I kept skype messaging Zach, wait, he's still not up...wait, he's still not up ... and then, "Omg, this is ridiculous...give me two seconds, I'm getting his ass up!"  An hour of chatting and laughing flew by.  He's so precious to me.  I miss him so.

I headed to the gym and nailed my glute/hamstring workout. 

I sat in the sun for 45 mins in the afternoon, listening to tunes, and reading magazines. 

I cleaned the back screened porch and then fired up the blower to hasten the drying process where puddles had formed on the porch floor ... I get it how men like their machines, their lawn gadgets and tools ... I feel so powerful with that thing...it's loud and spirited ... sort of the way I get at times?  ARGGH!!!

My youngest son spent the evening having fun (overdue) with friends, and I headed off for a planned Girls Night Out with a group of girls from my gym.  I was singing and giddy floating on my drive to the restaurant to meet them, and I manged to snap a shot of sunset while heading down the highway -- can the evening get better?  Oh.Yes.It.Did.

I can't remember when I've had so much fun...The noise level at our table had to be annoying to those around us.  We got a few looks.  (Were they checkin' us out?  Annoyed?  Jealous?)  What a shot in the arm.  GNO is as essential as breathing.

And this afternoon, trying to get caught up with chores, I get a text from Gavin, my middle son, who was spending the afternoon at The Irish Festival in PA (I'm jealous!).  Gavin is ALL THINGS IRISH.  He has always been obsessed with Irish anything.  He snaps a picture of this name plaque at the festival...His accompanying text message:

Wow.  It's exactly me.

And he's right.  It is.  Every.Single.Line.









It's been a great weekend.  And with the expectation of change in seasons...it's only gonna get better.

My heart overflows with gratefulness.

 

Like a Waterfall

I've discovered MY station on Pandora.
I have several.
Of course I do -- I'm a music addict.
 
But my newly created station is absolutely PERFECT for chillin'
 
It is simply:
Blank & Jones
And then as Pandora does,
kindred music is added randomly
and the listener gives it a thumbs up or down.
 
But I've had to "thumbs down" VERY few...
 
Take.Me.Away.
Keep it coming.
Love this stuff.
 
 
 can it get any deeper?


Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Take Me Out to the Ball Game

So our trip to PA this past weekend was a good one.   We arrived at my son's apartment around 1 pm on Saturday.  What?  It's all clean!  His girlfriend, we later found out, had spent two solid hours that morning cleaning, sanitizing, and organizing.  From what she tells us, he had not done any cleaning for quite some time, and she couldn't bear the thought of our spending the night there with it in such a state.  What a sweetheart -- and how DOES she put up with his slob-like existence?  It's a good thing she still lives at home and her exposure is short-lived and sporadic.  It was good chatting with her again too.  She filled me in on her nursing program that's under way at Duquesne.  One year to go, and she'll be ready to launch.

We had dinner with them Saturday night and bought tickets to see the 9:40 showing of Elysium at a local theater.  Very strange movie...!  One-third of the way through the movie, something happened to the sound and they had to stop the movie to attempt troubleshooting.  After about ten minutes and no success, management ended up giving all the patrons refunds and free tickets to see another movie. We gave our tickets to my son and his GF, since we don't live there and they would make better use of the freebies.  We headed back to his apartment to hang out and watch more movies.  But they chose the typical high-paced action thriller, and I decided to hibernate off by myself and read his August issue of Muscle Fitness Magazine featuring Hugh Jackman as "Wolverine" on the cover.  Yep.  I was convinced that would keep me happily preoccupied for a while.  

He has air conditioning in his apartment, but only downstairs, the kitchen/family room area.  Upstairs?  Not.  And that is where the small, windowless bathroom and the two bedrooms are.  His bedroom has a window fan in the window which he claims keeps him sufficiently comfortable while sleeping at night.  I would have thought he'd have saved some of his money to buy a window AC for the upstairs after two full months of summer heat and humidity.  But he's tight as the bark on a tree, and he seems to like living the minimalist lifestyle, boasting that questionable, austere bachelor reputation.  Keep it simple.  That's his motto.

Of course, that's fine for him, but not much fun for us when we come to visit.  I planned ahead and snagged a decent-sized turbo fan at 25% off at a local Rite Aide to take with us.  We had purchased a Coleman queen-sized air mattress for his second bedroom.  Although it's better than sleeping on the floor, I still did not get much rest Saturday night, both from the lack of AC (hey, I'm peri-menopausal!) and from bouncing (rolling) around on the air mattress every time I wanted to reposition.  When dawn hit, I was more than ready to get up and at it.  Now.  Where's the coffee?

His coffee pot is sad.  Very sad.  I made a half pot of coffee to start me off while everyone else was still sleeping.  Eager for that first sip, I was sorely disappointed that it was actually not very hot.  Note to self:  He needs a new coffee pot.  As I took a look around, I began seeing many other things that he was in need of, and I began making a list of things to buy him for Christmas for his apartment.  Women are far more aware of the details.  And this woman NEVER takes them for granted. 

We made it to the Pirates game, excited from the energy of the fans, the sounds, the smells, the people, the food.  I love watching live professional baseball.  My youngest son is a Cardinals fan, so that made the rivalry between him and his brother a bit more engaging.  Me?  I was rooting for the Pirates, along with my son and his GF.  My husband was ambivalent.  The Cardinals ended up wiping out the Pirates, and my son was overjoyed, rubbing it in his brother's face at every chance.  I drank two Bud Lites while at the game, and only indulged in two of my son's monstrous bucket of wings, trying to stick to my diet and save most of my calories and carbs on dinner after the game.  It didn't bother me much that the Pirates were losing.  I was having fun people watching (my, are there some weirdos out there!) and just hanging out with my family.  There was a nice breeze most of the game, and we had loads of fun.  I managed to snap a couple shots of "Cutch" at bat.  There's just something sexy about that hair...

We had dinner at Joe's Crab Shack.  Colton loves that place and we don't have one where we live.  We always take him to eat at Joe's while vacationing on Marco Island, but he didn't go to Marco this year, and getting to eat with the family at Joe's in Pittsburgh made up for it.  I had two Ultras -- that comes to four, I'm counting -- along with my grilled shrimp and steamed veggie dinner.  Safe choice?  Yet beer is SO filling!  I'm mostly a red wine woman, but I'd already started with beer at the game the fun, laid-back atmosphere at Joe's seemed to shout BEER.  A total of four beers over the course of six hours... eh, not so bad.

We had to drive home Sunday night because my son had a JV football game at 10:00 the next morning, and we'd have to be up early for the game to allow for travel time.  It was a long drive home, not having much rest the two nights before, and needless to say I was exhausted when I arrived home.  And that fatigue intensified the following day.  It was an exhaustion that cleverly masquerades as hunger and cravings when I am not on my toes and ready to fight it.  And I wasn't.  And I gave in.  Nosiree, I was NOT a good girl on my diet on Monday.  I did manage to get in a two-hour, much needed afternoon nap.  I was feeling more and more like a slug as the day wore on.

No worries, and no regrets.  It was a fun-filled and happy weekend overall, visiting with my son and his girlfriend in PA.  Happy times, good food, laughter, memories.

And now life resumes...back to normal...and fall is only days away.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Friday Night Live

It's frustrating to me when I want to purge in my blog, yet life gets in the way and there just isn't enough time.  Thoughts... all these thoughts and words and just STUFF that pops in my head that I want to write about.  They fill up my head and then have nowhere to go... when I'm too busy to write.  The need to purge, to breathe, to exhale to empty.  It's what sets it apart.  Don't just write...one must write from the heart.



I try to remember to jot reminders on my NOTE app on my iPhone.
Don't let this escape, I say to myself...
 
I'm headed to PA this weekend to see my son -- first time in two months.
We have tickets to see the Pirates vs. Cardinals on Sunday!!!
Woooohoooo.
I was thinking the other morning as I was getting dressed for work:
What could top this, getting to see this high-energy game with my family?
And then my mind darted instantly to music.
Imagine that.
Of course music is gonna have something to do with the perfect dream.
I imagined Toni Braxton singing the Star Spangled Banner at the game.
Right!  Toni Braxton?
Dream on, T.
 
It's fun to dream.
 
(Pause...for a sip of wine)
Delish.
 
Checking off things on my day's agenda, one by one.
It's been a day of accomplishments as well as relaxing.
I'm blessed to have been able to take the day off...have this day to myself.
For myself.
I sleep in.  I leisurely lather in coffee.  Then I head to the gym and kick ass.
I Skype with Zach...!!!...
(imagine my heart on a playground swing, riding high as the clouds...how high can I go?)
 
Among the other things I managed to accomplish?
Homemade macaroni & cheese for Son #3.
Oh, he's gonna kiss my feet for this stuff!
I gloat.
 
(Another sip of wine)
 
But the list is not finished...there's more to do
before heading out to his football game tonight.
So.  I will end with some live music to kick off the weekend
from one of my favorite artists.
 
Can you imagine having a gift such as this?
Where DOES that voice come from?
 
Happy Friday, World.
Sing like nobody's listening...
 
 
 



Wednesday, August 21, 2013

What's That Sound?

It's the echo of more empty rooms than there used to be in our house.  Coming to terms with first Gavin graduating from college, and only weeks later being offered promising employment in the Pittsburg area, then Zach leaving for Japan to teach for a year (or more...?), it's been a slow and heart-numbing process. 

Moving Day


I've tried very hard not to dwell on it.  We've raised our sons to be independent and hungry for life, and they've rewarded us with applying themselves through college and beginning down the path of each of their futures with fearless, undaunted anticipation.  All set.  They've launched.  Their rooms lie empty and hollow, discarded pieces of their past strewn around here and there.  Remnants.  Reminders of their youth.  Of yesterday.  I avoid those rooms.  I don't need to see those reminders.  The hole in my heart is proof enough.

I've done a pretty good job at disguising the hole.  It's like when the hem in your pants leg comes loose at the office, you've no needle or thread, so you grab some packing tape (I even used staples once !  YES.I.DID.), do a little improv quick-mending, and then carry on, head held high, maintaining the as-you-were confident stride...nothing is amiss -- don't let 'em see you sweat:  I'm good.  I got this.  Movin' on here...

And that's where my mind has been these days, seeking out diversions to disguise the tearing that's begun around the edges of the heart.  (Got tape?)  Besides, I still have Colton and his adolescent moodiness to keep me distracted and busy and -- well, rather annoyed mostly.  Honestly.  No respect!  And I'm supposed to know how to read his mind daily, of course. 

Just yesterday I was at the mall on my lunch hour shopping for him.  He had asked me to buy him a couple polo shirts.  He made it clear that he wanted dark colors, and absolutely no red, orange or yellow.  And no weird colors.  Okay.  That's simple enough.  And so I made my way to Penney's since they were having a sale on their summer merchandise and appeared to have a nice selection of polos to choose from, lots of brands, lots of colors and patterns. 

Ten cell phone pics and 15-20 texts later, I was able to finally find exactly TWO that fit the bill.  I wasn't going to waste my time with returns.  This is a no-brainer:  Snap a picture, get his feedback via texting, and keep going until you hit the jackpot.  Ten tries and I finally got it right.  I ended up with a charcoal and a dark marine blue, both with a very subtle stripe tone-on-tone pattern.  Very non-showy, conservative.  Safe.  Let me blend.  Yep.  That's his style.

As I was boiling chicken yesterday evening for dinner to make chicken wraps, he comes in from football practice and this conversation ensues as I'm standing on the counter, busy painting some whimsy on the kitchen wall above the cabinets -- me and my projects! 

HIM:  What are you doing?
ME:    I'm painting.
HIM:  Yeah, I KNOW that.  But why?
ME:    Why not?
HIM:   (slight pause) What's for dinner?
ME:    Chicken wraps.
HIM:   I don't want to eat yet.
ME:    Good.  Because they're not ready.
HIM:   Well, when are they going to be ready?
ME:    When you tell me you're ready to eat.
HIM:  (silence...then)  Well, we don't have anymore cheese.
ME:    Yes, we do.  I got some at the store.
HIM:  And we're out of Gatorade...and milk...and don't buy anymore of that kind of bread you bought the last time...and the next time you get wraps, get the bigger ones.  And I need more whey protein too.   And peanut butter.
ME:    Yep.
HIM:   Were you listening to me?
ME:    Yep.
HIM:   Well, you need to get that stuff tonight.
ME:     Done deal.
HIM:   All that stuff?  You got all of it already?
ME:    Yep.
HIM:   (silence)
ME:    Thank you.
HIM:   Uh.  Yeah ... (as he saunters away to the shower)...

In the meantime, just this week I was sent a lovely photo via text from Gavin's girlfriend, a photo of the two of them at her best friend's wedding last weekend, all dressed up and looking smart, sophisticated and sassy.  And I get an email from Zach this morning telling me about his first few days of on-the-job training, how it went well, and promising me he'll have his roommate take a picture of him in his suit to send to me (my request); oh, yeah, and that he bought an iron, so I can relax; and asking me if we want to Skype again Saturday morning like we did last weekend...will that work for me? 

You bet it will.  I wouldn't miss it for the world. 

Letting go.  It's a work in progress.



Seeing with My Heart

I've often thought how sad it would be to be born blind, to never know what the sun looked like, or the moon, or snow, or the ocean...a flower...a puppy's face...a rollling pasture...or a mountain range.  When I marvel at these things, my heart fills up with such joy.  It truly overflows.  Maybe that's how blind people see -- through their hearts!  Maybe what's important here is the effect on our hearts of what we see with our eyes.  Maybe God allows blind people to see with a far deeper clarity, a much more vivid and broader appreciation of things when seen with the heart.

That is how I felt this morning.  I was reminded of God's miraculous creation all around me this morning, an arresting sense of beauty.  So unsettling that it stopped me in my tracks, not once, but many times throughout my morning. 



It was dark out as I turned the door knob and headed out my back door to the driveway.  As I made my way to the driver's side of my car, I casually glanced upward -- I'm certain it was instinctive, the light drawing me to pay attention, to come closer -- and I saw it.  The moon was full and bright and so very lovely, a slow-moving strip of clouds passing in front of it, casting the most beautiful shadows.  I uttered something, I don't even remember, because at that instant I forgot everything...who I was, what I had been thinking, where I was going.  I was instantly paralyzed with this simple yet alarming beauty. 

And then I remembered...oh, yeah, the gym, I'm running late, I need to hurry or I won't get in a full workout.  But I simply could not take another step without first grabbing my camera on my cell phone and snapping a few shots. 

(Unfortunately, my cell phone cam didn't deliver; but my mind remembers!)

As I headed toward the gym, driving down the highway my view of the moon was even more rewarding.  It seemed even bigger and brighter and more lovely than minutes ago from my driveway.  As if on cue, a yummy guitar instrumental was playing on a Blank & Jones CD, Face a la Mer -- what perfect background music for this morning -- and I was overcome with a sense of euphoria.  Lifesize euphoria.

When I returned home, the sun having long since made its debut, I took notice of how the morning had begun to unfold.  And I didn't want to miss a thing...

 
 

 


 
 For it to be an ordinary, uneventful Wednesday,
I was blessed with a sense of joy all about me,
having witnessed the beauty of simple pleasures
not just with my eyes,
but with my heart.
 
And my soul cried out with praise.

 


Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Encounters

encounters
 
 
Profoundly true. 
People we encounter in our lives,
for a reason or for a season,
whether they stay or go,
they leave pieces of themselves
intricately and forever
weaved into our hearts
transforming us
for as long as we breathe.