Dance...Dance With It...Then You Ramp It Up

I spent the weekend with my middle son and his fiance.  She had invited me to attend the Pittsburgh Bridal Show along with her, her sisters, mom, aunt and best friend.  We had a wonderful time on that Girls Day Out -- all.day.long.  Great memories and fun.  AND I got to spend time with Gavin too while there with them.

It still catches me off guard a bit when I see him, his physique at the best its ever been.  I'm used to seeing the physique of a nose guard, tons of muscle, but lots of bulk along with it.  Year after year.  The Big Guy on the line.  Not now.  Oh, he's massive, all right, but along with that, ripped, sculpted, mean and clean.

I watch him eat.  I watch him move.  Like a lion.  I watch him prepare his food.  I listen with fascination as he shares with me over dinner Friday night the afternoon during the Christmas holiday visit that he and my youngest son went to the shot/discus field at the HS and threw together.  About how he watched his little brother in silence, studying his form, his steps, his timing...throw after throw, they each taking turns throwing shot and discus.  Gavin having thrown at the college level and a master at his sport, he began reviewing with his brother his form, his technique, dissecting every nuance of movement, half second by half second, guiding him, shedding light where there was deficiencies, as Colton eagerly listened, appreciative, soaking it in like a sponge, and willingly following his brother's coaching and input.

"...and at that point you gotta let your body fall into it... flowing... that's it... fall into the movement...dance with it...dance...just dance with it...then ramp up the power ... explode at the apex..."

I smile in admiration, entertained with his keen sense of mastery, and how it electrified him to have explained all the things he'd learned with his younger brother who was following in his footsteps.

I listen as he shares with me his own progress with bodybuilding over the past few months, and how now, just days into his prep for his next show, he's already leaner and stronger than he was towards the end of his first prep last summer.

I open their frig and see it stocked with lean meats, almond milk, fruits, bottled water, veggies.  It's admirably sterile.  I notice how she willingly, lovingly, helps him prepare his meals, her fastidious shopping for his diet's required foods.  The frig is void of junk, void of most anything off plan.  I nod inwardly, galvanized at the sight of it, knowing the impact such way of eating has on how we feel, how we look, how we move.  I remember.  Affirmations. They kept coming.

The holidays were wonderful.  They are meant to be celebrated.  The traditions, the celebrations, the gatherings accompanied by favorite foods, savory and sweet and delectable.  I don't regret any of it.  But although the holidays are over, the allowances and indulgence make for a very slippery slope.  Just this one cookie....just a few crackers, harmless...trying to convince myself that these small indulgences surely can't be hindering my willpower to get back on the healthy wagon.   In denial, I've stayed hidden behind those mental shams, stray crackers unmindfully getting crammed into my mouth...the reckless it's-only-a-bite mentality.

What?  I don't MIND feeling bloated.  It's okay if I succumb to winter laziness. So what if my clothes feel a little tight, I can hide under the roomier clothes for a while longer....so what that an ever-growing segment of my closet has shifted to the "skinny" section.  And waking up tired most mornings?   Must be age.  And it's okay that my joints feel a little stiffer than usual -- you know, it's just the age thing again, hormones.  Nothing I can do about THAT.  Yep.  Damn shame. Pass the crackers, please.

BULLSHIT.

The visit with him was a kick in the head.  A resounding wake up call to get back to what I know will bring me a better quality of life.  Fulfillment.  Contentment and self-confidence.  Well being.

Today is my third day on my quasi "prep" diet -- basically following my prep diet from 2011, but with slight exceptions, namely allowances for lean dairy, wine on Fridays, a whole egg mixed in with my egg whites in the mornings, Protein No-Bakes -- one per day -- at mid morning with coffee. Otherwise, it's basically lean meat, green veggies, rice or sweet potato or oats at three out of five meals, half a grapefruit at breakfast.  Eating every 2.5 to 3 hours.  Sufficient protein at each meal.  Healthy fats.

And in just a little over 48 hours?  I'm already feeling incredible.  My energy has gone out the roof.  Visible tightening in the mirror -- this soon!  The bloat is almost totally gone. And I'm jacked.  I've found my rhythm...falling back into it...dancing...dancing with it.  I have until April 3rd when we leave for Marco Island to drop 10 to 12 lbs.  This 54-year-old woman is gonna rock her bikini. Cover-ups be damned. No more hiding behind the excuse of age.

Energy.  Inspiration.  Motivation.  Drive.  Discipline.  It's all come back.  Will the weekends be the biggest test?  Hell yes.  How bad do I want this?  Well, that's the mantra I'll need to keep repeating in the meantime.