The White Noise of Winter

I've always been a seasonal sort of woman, embracing each, patient till the next.

In later years, I've become -- well, less patient.  I'm pretty sure it's a vitamn D thing.  The older I get the more I need.  My deficit accumulates, and I suddenly feel an overwhelming sense of suffocation.  Immobile.  Fuzzy-brained.  Apathy and indifference to things that normally captivate me.

The monotony of winter's cold air and the lack of sunlight seem to have a deafening effect on my ability to stay focused, stay positive, move forward.  Beginning as an elegy, it finds crescendo in the increasing frequency of frigid temperatures, dismal gray days, lifeless black and white landscapes blanketed with dry and biting winds, leafless trees, brittle yellow grass -- or no grass at all.  Day after day.  BLEAK and DEAFENING.  A forte of winter's white noise.

Driving home from a job last week, I was thankful to see a cloudless, sunny sky.  Despite the deceiving cold outside temperatures, driving down the highway I opened my sun roof and stretched my face to the sky, lusting for the warmth of the sun's rays on my face.  Drinking down every.glorious.drop.  And with every second that passed, an opaque veil began to lift from my eyes, cobwebs began shredding and loosening from my mind, and deep, stirring energy was restored to every nuance of my being, all negative thoughts dissipating.  Gone.

And for the next several minutes, the white noise of winter was defeated with the distant sounds of spring and summer.....
children's laughter, water splashing, waves crashing, live music on the levee, seagulls squawking...
Enveloped in an allegro of all things summer.

Spring is on the horizon.
Let me just hang on a while longer as I learn to navigate and silence the white noise.