You Can Lead a Horse to Water...

 You can lead a horse

to water, but

you can’t

 make him drink.

 

Sweaty and worn out, I had just arrived home from my spinning class and was having some post workout nutrition -- dinner.   My husband tells me I look sexy when I'm sweaty, hair all mussed up, dressed in workout clothes.  Hmm.  Imagine that!  That's nice.  Irritating, is what it is. 

 

I'll finish my story.

 

So my youngest son walks by, having just showered after finishing up his own lifting session with some of friends.  This conversation ensues:

 

HUSBAND:    Have you noticed C lately? 

 

..................(to C)  Turn around, let your mom see your back.

 

(C complies sheepishly)

 

ME:     What?  His muscles?  Yes, I've BEEN noticing that for a long time.  It's very noticeable.  He's really gained a lot of muscle in his back, chest and arms.  He looks great!

 

HUSBAND:     Yes, he does.   You can really see the difference just in the last few weeks.

 

ME:     Yep.  It's that hard work and good genes.  He's blessed with being able to add muscle easily.

 

HUSBAND:      Uh-huh...

 

ME:      (in an encouraging tone, smile on my face)  Yes, just think.  Imagine how YOUR body would transform if you were to lift weights now and then... !  (smile fixed on my face, dead stare.)

 

HUSBAND:     (reciprocal dead stare; no response) 

 

 

It's very strange. He's quite the cheerleader.  Quite the advocate.  And I get compliments from him on my efforts at staying fit, working out, all.the.time.  My sons get kudos and support from staying fit, getting strong, working hard. 

 

Yet no matter how I approach this subject -- and believe me, I've tried every way known to man for years and years and years, even avoiding the subject entirely, still ... I run into a brick wall with his reciprocity. 

 

In a word?  It hurts. 

 

Isn't one of the first lessons we learned in kindergarten to "play fair" ... ?

 

quid pro quo?

Yes, there's a lot of truth to what they say.  You can set an example, you can cover it with sugar, you can throw vinegar on it, you can disguise it, hint at it, analyze it, encourage it, ignore it, give credence to it, beg for it, plead for it, flirt for it -- the list goes on and on and on...

 

But some things just never change.